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Philosofun (with tears)

by Try to Understand

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1.
Underneath my thumb A pile of bones A puddle of blood And I drive on Yes, every morning still I wake up. And inside my brain A bundle of nerves Of pleasures and pains And I am all All of it combined into One One One All in one, yeah.
2.
No es una cosa de respeto. No es una cosa de amor. Es más bien algo del egoismo Si soy solo otro organismo. (It's not about respect. It's not about love. It's rather a matter of selfishness, If I'm just another organism.) 1845 Thoreau went to Walden Pond. 1831 Young Darwin sailed the sea. In a sense, both naturalists Were searching for the place of Man. One would say his fate is life, The other only death. Yo tengo control (I have control) But I'm still an animal. Yo tengo control But I'm still an animal. Yo tengo control But I'm still an animal! Y qué paradoja. (And what a paradox.)
3.
Running On my own now. I wish that my friends Were still in town. Waking Up to your eyes Smiling back at me Makes things seem alright. Working At a spat on job. Maybe I Should be moving on.
4.
If I was a Russian queen, I'd be so mean. I'd terrorize the plebes. And if I was a preteen, I'd be a fiend. I'd bully everything. Well what I mean to say is, Sometimes I just get Easily upset. Yeah what I meant to say was Sometimes I just get Easily upset. If I was a scorpion, I would reserve my sting. I wouldn't hurt a thing. And if I was a Russian queen, I'd flee the scene. I'd finally be free! But I never was, so long Anastasia of my heart. But I never was, so long Anastasia of my heart. Oh mystery of all existence, Where do unreal things get their substance? Oh mystery of all contingence, Could anything ever be different? Could it have been different? But it never is, so long Anesthesia to my heart. But I'm Frankenstein, so Shock me and I'll restart. If I was a jumping bean, I'd be a mean, Well that's not what I mean. If I was a Russian queen, I'd be a mean, Well that's not what I mean. Well what I mean to say is All these things that I'm imagining Are just imaginary. Well what I meant to say was Sometimes things are just Imaginary. And if I ever was any kind of other thing, I just wouldn't be me.
5.
I took my car up to Loser's Point. Stared ahead and said, "I'm dead now." But I couldn't wait to see my friends at the party the next day. I stood and watched the pink sky fade to gray and the sun disappearing. It's kinda nice when you can't feel the sting of someone leaving, But makes you scared that you don't care enough to try to save anything. Oh, all my life I only wanted to be tranquil. The perfect Buddhist is the squirrel that successfully reaches roadkill. And my clock keeps turning On and off Maybe two or three times every second. And I keep waking from my sleep Trying to remember What it was that gave me company. It's hard to move when your feet are glued to the ground. I never knew what I could do with you around. When you saw me gathering dust on the shelf, You could tell that I could not save myself.
6.
Have you ever Thought about getting killed by a bomb from the Former Soviet Union? I mean, the Cold War wasn't really that long ago. And did you ever Really think about crossing over that yellow line? What would it feel like? And would you really start to lose your conscious mind? But why Should I care If one day I never wake up? Maybe I wouldn't have to get out of bed. Maybe I wouldn't have to go back to work. It's all so uncertain As if we're living behind a big curtain. Maybe the show's on the other side, Or maybe when we die we just die. Not to be so Morbid and macabre, I Do not intend to depress My dearest friends and strangers. I only wish to recollect for us the fact That death is always near. We could be here one day, and God only knows where the next. I wonder where we go to. I'm wondering if you know, and Could you tell the rest Of us where we go If one day we die in our sleep? Maybe we stay in the brightness of our dreams. Maybe we reawake on another scene. It's all so uncertain As if we're living behind a big curtain. Maybe the show's on the other side, Or maybe when we die we just die.
7.
For a second there I thought you disappeared It rains a lot this time of year And we both go together if one falls down I talk out loud like you're still around No, no And I miss you I'm goin' back home to the West Coast I wish you would've put yourself in my suitcase I love you Standin' all alone in a black coat I miss you I'm goin' back home to the West Coast And if you shake her hard enough she will appear Tonight I think I'll be stayin' here And you never did like this town I talk out loud like you're still around No, no And I miss you I'm goin' back home to the West Coast I wish you would've put yourself in my suitcase I love you Standin' all alone in a black coat I miss you I'm goin' back home to the West Coast Come on, everybody La la la la, la la la la-la La la la la, la la la la-la So pack up the bags to beat back the clock Do I let her sleep or should I wake her up? You said We both go together if one falls down Yeah, right, heh I talk out loud like you're still around Oh, no, no And I miss you I'm goin' back home to the West Coast I wish you would've put yourself in my suitcase I love you Standin' all alone in a black coat I miss you I'm goin' back home to the West Coast Goin' back home to the West Coast Goin' back home to the West Coast
8.
And there will be rejoicing Here When All the bombs disappear. But tonight it's raining From the sky Over Jerusalem. Behind the wall All the pages get wet And you start to forget What the Good Lord said. It's hard to fight a feeling When it's all You've got left. They've taken down your wall, and You decide to send a prayer with your last breath. Behind the wall All the pages get wet And you start to forget What the Good Lord said. Behind the wall All the pages get wet And you start to forget What the Good Lord said: That there would be rejoicing Here When All the bombs disappear. Till then, we sing Our hymns to the Lord as All we love gets wet. Pray for peace, the true Jerusalem. Pray for peace, the true Jerusalem.
9.
On a waterfall I saw a bird A dove, a symbol. Maybe not. An organism To be cut A life, a part A fleeting thought In the grand scale of events In the grand scale of events I hope to know. On a personal note, I have nothing to say. I know nothing at all. So I'll just keep my mouth shut. It's nothing serious. It's just the passing of the time. And at the end of the day, At the end of our days, One in seven billion lives. The Great Plains Bison Ancient Egypt All the facts that can't be known. That's why I love my books The precious records Of another world. In the grand scale of events, In the grand scale of events, I hope to know! I live my life a world apart The other side that's in my heart. Is it outside that turns my thoughts? Or am I able to break off? In the grand scale of events, I hope to know. On a personal note, I have nothing to say. I know nothing at all So I'll just keep my mouth shut. It's nothing serious. It's just the passing of the time. And at the end of the day, At the end of our days, One in seven billion One in seven billion lives, And that's just fine.
10.
Don't get depressed. Don't give up on your whole life yet. It's only yesterday. You've got another day ahead. And there is time Yes, in a moment there is time For all the thoughts that you forgot to think While watching porn online. And everything you love is bundled up inside your sleeping heart. You can't forget All the forevers that you said And all the betters that you felt While you were holding her in bed. But you are blind If you can't leave the past behind, Because I swear my friend those nights are dead But you are still alive. And everyone you love is bundled up inside your sleeping heart. So go outside or phone a friend before your psyche falls apart. Yeah! And if you're bored, You still have something left to find: Electric miracles behind All of those patterns in your mind. And there's a love. Yes, there's a love that's still untapped, And all you have to do to get it Is forget about the past.
11.
This song is not about me And it's not about you. It's not about what I believe Or what we want to be true. Cuz I don't know my beliefs And we don't know what we want. And we don't know where we're going, And we don't know where we're from. This is the song of our unknowing. This is a shout with no referent Yeah! For all the things we'll never comprehend, and For all the facts that we've forgotten. This is the chorus of our never knowing them. You got a letter one day But it wasn't from anyone. I wrote a letter one day. Oh well, it wasn't from anyone. Cuz I tried to stay away. And I tried to stay awake. But when I woke up in the morning I was back in my own body, so I Went downstairs and made a cup of coffee. Then I Ate some sugar, drank a glass of Water, and I thought about it. Thought of us together. Thought about my friends. I wish they'd never left. And then I Sat down on the couch and curled up Like a lotus. Let my mind run blank until I'm Talking with my Maker, and I Asked Him why we're not together, Why I've got this body, why Everything seems so separate. And, Even if it's not, I mean It still sort of is, I mean At least for now, I mean And that still sortof sucks, right? Right. This is the song of our unknowing. This is a shout with no referent. Yeah! For all the things we'll never comprehend, and For all the crap that we cannot forget. Yeah. This is the chorus of our never knowing them. But now I think I've said enough, because this Song is about us, and it is Not about complaining. It's a- Bout eternal truths and e- Thereal unions. Hey do you think if The internet gets big enough, then We'll all be together, Reconnected, like the Brahma or the Body of Christ? Ok, I've said enough, Cuz this song's about unknowing, And I think maybe I know enough, like It's always better to make friends Than it is to make enemies. I said, It's always better to make friends Than it is to make enemies. This is the song of our unknowing. This is a shout with no referent. Yeah! For all the things we'll never comprehend, and For all the facts that we've forgotten. Yeah. This is the chorus of our Never knowing them.
12.
Ojalá que Ojalá que Que no caiga Este nube. Y ojalá que Ojalá que Que me traigas Cuando viajes. Espero que el amor No pare. Espero el amor! Tú hablaste Tú soñaste De otro lugar Y otra casa. Y yo te dije Tú elije Lo que quieras Y te seguiré. Espero que el amor No pare. Espero el amor! Espero que el amor No pare. Espero el amor! English: (I hope to God I hope to God That this cloud Doesn't fall down. I hope to God I hope to God That you bring me When you travel. I hope that the love Doesn't stop. I wait for love! You spoke You dreamed Of another place And another house. And I told you, You choose Whatever you want And I will follow. I hope that the love Doesn't stop. I wait for love! I hope that the love Doesn't stop. I wait for love!)

about

These 12 songs encapsulate much of what I've been thinking, feeling, and working on over the past few years. They are mostly philosophical, and at the same chronicle some of my deepest struggles and greatest joys. I am proud of the level of honesty I've achieved in the lyrics, some of which are short but dense, others of which are more detailed. These songs also show my growth as a musician over the three years since graduating college. Some were written a few months ago, and others were written years ago. I'm proud to have reached a level of playing ability that I think does all of these songs justice.

credits

released December 30, 2019

Recorded at Studio G in Naugatuck, CT by Eddie Golden III.
Mixed and mastered by Eddie Golden III.
All songs written by Dan Creem, except West Coast, written by Jason Schwartzman.
All music performed by Dan Creem, except organ on West Coast, by Eddie Golden III.
Album artwork by Jill Verzino.

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Try to Understand Waterbury, Connecticut

A poet turned songwriter. Still developing skills as a recording artist. Currently working alone with occasional collaborations, but hopefully a full band soon.

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